She thought she was a lover but she's not one. Just the pinprick empty, her body all numb. When the neighbor turns off the lights she slowly dresses. Argyle and stripes with a licorice whiplash for protection. She has nimble moves that make no sense. The sock hat stifles her ghost writing when she scales the sides of suburbia. A nuclear beauty of a sunset closes in on the tepid landscape of drawn shades, muesli affluence, and branded monotony. Her head full up with a cloud, lost in there without a sun. She wants something she's not capable of. Hopeless romantic...something something frantic. And without a purpose she cat burgles and drinks from the bird bathes of unknown magnificently middle class pleasure areas. In the side yard her body manipulates the darkness. When she gets into the home she wanders around with her mind taking footage like a blank tape. None of it is recorded. She doesn't take anything from the break in. She doesn't mind leaving behind a feeling of unrepentant idleness. When the occupants of the house awake in the night it is not to a bump in the night. It is to a nameless grief that streaks in through the windows out there where the mercury vapor decay dreams up more and more roads that lead to work. The husband gets out of the vague design he sleeps in and stumbles to the bathroom to stare at himself in the mirror with eyes like slate; she lurks below. She gets out of there long before the husband points at himself. She gets away and smirks. For her's is a life of unseemly cantor in unfamiliar pajamas. Their bed clothes symbolically wrapping her cold abdomen up in a familial congeniality she can't fathom. She is of the Grief Family: forever getting typecast as the waste that she is. She strips off the woolen sweater in the steam of a sultry summer night upon return from another redundancy. The air thickens around her. Forgive the lucky end to every moon, she muses as she rides herself into another nightly rut. She lets go of the crimson cane and it clatters to the floor: she does not hear a thing. She pulls the stripes down over her nose: it doesn't change a thing. She can't seem to make up her mind on whether she is deaf or blind.
The grievous procession waves their hands and they seem to be holding their previous relations at bay while the murk gives them another opportunity to get up and fall down. They are the third generation of the Grief Family. No more qualms about it. The matriarch has fallen. They tie her up in gaudy pink ribbons and close the lid on her gilded rose coffin with sadness and triumph. Hats off for the hearse, yet curse each remembrance with a statement whittled thin and terse. They've got the ideas but not the execution. Their notions just tease them when they should line them up and shoot them. And with the smell of death on their shoulders they freshen their breath. They're a decade older and done up in each others eyes with lies. Throw everything away so as to doll up this romantic fray. These days of indecision and insecurity steadily overarching, they are overly conscious of who should get them. Their words are nothing but gravestones lined up, stone icons of suggestions past. And present: They stand. Done down and damned. When they set the stone in the muddy ground it will sit and wait. Over the years the birds will drop their condolences upon the marker and make it look as if it were splattered with marzipan. Sweet shit, mutters the ugly grandson. In the haze of the funeral party, each drink is a reminder of the essential inability to express oneself. They swim out in a consensual circle; the human buoys a chart of single points on a black and white grid. Unconnected they moan within all this stupid swaying, dim noises out there in the crescent moon refracted upon the surface of something.